THE GOP'S XENOPHOBIC GOOFINESS

Did you see that picture of George W riding around in circles in a decked-out red-white-and-blue dune buggy down on the Mexican border? Apparently, he was trying to look like a tough-guy border defender, protecting us from illegal immigrants. Instead, he looked like some goofy cartoon character out of the "Flintstones."

Did you see that picture of George W riding around in circles in a decked-out red-white-and-blue dune buggy down on the Mexican border? Apparently, he was trying to look like a tough-guy border defender, protecting us from illegal immigrants. Instead, he looked like some goofy cartoon character out of the “Flintstones.”

It was perfect symbolism, though, for the Republican leadership has been running around in circles on the immigration issue, clownishly trying to juggle their right-wing, lock-’em-out, anti-immigrant absolutism – while also trying to dance the two-step with their big business backers who happen to profit from the cheap labor of destitute Latino laborers. So, on the one hand, these clowns want to militarize the Mexican border (including erecting a monstrous, three-tiered fence to keep Mexicans out), but on the other hand they want a bracero-style program to keep the cheap labor flowing into our country.

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Then, just when you thought their political posturing couldn’t get any goofier than putting Bush in a dune buggy, they came up with a truly-silly act of hyperactive xenophobia: they passed a resolution declaring that English is the “national language” of the USA. Wow – that’ll show those immigrants! Not since the house decreed in 2003 that French fries should be renamed “freedom fries” has our congress demonstrated such ludicrous loopiness and embarrassing ineptness.

Their “speak English” bill is a hoot, for it requires more thorough testing to prove English language proficiency. Yet, the very goof-balls pushing this wouldn’t know proper English if it smacked ’em in the mouth – have you ever heard George W talk? This is the mumble-mouth who routinely says things like: “Rarely is the question asked – is our children learning?”

This is Jim Hightower saying… Forget remembering the Alamo – with this new law, our Texas war cry will have to be: ” Remember the Cottonwood!”

Sources:
“Here’s Some Plain English: We Have Bigger Problems,” Austin American-Statesman, May 21, 2006.
“Senate Measure Designates English “National Language,” The Washington Post, May 19, 2006.

“Battling the bastards is about as much fun as you can have with your clothes on.”

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