WHEN TOM SPEAKS, PEOPLE GIGGLE

O, let us rejoice, for he's back!

O, let us rejoice, for he’s back!

Tom DeLay, I mean – the corrupt ego maniac who rose to power in the U.S. house of Representatives before falling into disgrace over his habit of trading legislative favors for corporate campaign cash. Not only was DeLay a poster boy of congressional corruption during the Republican years of this decade, but he also pushed some of the goofiest, most extreme ideas spawned by right-wing ideologues.

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For example, while he consistently prevented increases in the minimum wage for the lowest-paid Americans, he just as consistently saw to it that his own congressional pay was increased annually. When confronted with this hypocrisy, Tom blurted out, “I challenge anyone to live on my salary.” He was making $166,000 a year! You hear a guy say something like that and you think: a hundred thousand sperm and you were the fastest?

Unfortunately for commentators like me, DeLay got indicted in 2005 and dropped off the political radar. But now – O, Glory – he’s back! There he was on CNN recently, wallowing once again in the mud of right-wing gibberish. There should be no extension of unemployment benefits for the millions of Americans in today’s severely depressed job market, he grunted. Why? Because, asserted Tom, such a program “Keeps people from going and finding jobs.”

Shaking her head incredulously, the interviewer asked if he was actually saying that people were unemployed because they want to be? “Well,” answered this once-powerful lawmaker, “it is the truth, and people in the real world know it.”

The real world? Tom hasn’t even visited there for decades. But bless his heart, thank goodness he’s not letting reality intrude into his fantasy world, and thank goodness he’s back on TV. I for one find his insights as refreshing as ever.

“Tom DeLay: People Are Unemployed Because They Want To Be,” www.yahoo.com, March 7, 2010.

“Battling the bastards is about as much fun as you can have with your clothes on.”

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